Ladder

I would have to post this for future reference. As anyone who knows me on the surface can see, I'm still fucked as a little cat as of now. And that, would never be a good thing. It can be, only in disguise. But I need more than every single bit of sanity I can muster to reach for the gold on the mud I'm slithering upon.

Here, I will discuss about the breadcrumbs I'm leaving the future me-like creatures who would find themselves stuck in the physical them, to which they'd feel they do not belong to, nor to this world. (I can't be the only one.)

As for me, yeah, reconstructing the bridges I burned would help the burning my chest feels. That's the first step. And if I trip upon my bridge steps, then I'd be back to square one. This isn't easy, and I don't have even a nano second to waste. This is grueling at all 360 angles, and I could fall with just a small nudge. I don't have any emotional foundation right now, and everyone is fake. I can't trust a stage I play a protagonist at.

Fix the social ties, live as a social being, while you reclaim the throne that is your own body. Way to go, me.

I'd update this blog upon the next stages of my 'development'.

PS.
self-proclaimed relapse date: August 9, 2017

I'm crawling my way outta this predicament. I'm a bit more okay than yesterday.